What's Going On?

For the record, I am hurtin’. I have never gotten so excited about a product launch before, and now I know the bitter sting of disappointment.

Now that I’ve had a little bit of time to calm down (and stop <sob/>’ing), I just can’t get away from this: there is really nothing revolutionary about this. It’s literally a bigass iPhone. Let me count the ways:

1. The physical layout is exactly the same: volume controls on the right, power button on the top right, home button on the bottom, headphone jack on the upper left. They really did nothing more than expand it.
2. The home screen is nothing more than a scaled up version of the iPhone home screen. It’s 4 icons by something; I still haven’t checked out the new 3.2 SDK since it’s Snow Leopard only), with a dock/quicklaunch at the bottom (6 versus 4! Ooooo…).
3. No multitasking??? Hopefully it’s just around the corner like the rumors say (like it’s been for like a year now). It _really_ doesn’t make sense, given that the official reason before was battery life; this thing is supposed to clock 10 hours of usage, and a month of standby!
4. Virtual frakking keyboard, only. This is what’s killing me: there’s so much potential to revolutionize data entry with this form factor, and it just feels squandered. How can you use two thumbs to reach across a 9.7 inch diagonal slab??? Putting it in your lap is super-duper lame. Basically, it’s as efficient to actually write something (even an email) with the iPad as it is with the iPhone. <sob>What a waste</sob>.

Other thoughts:

1. The price is pretty freakin’ amazing. On that, Apple certainly did deliver. Kudos for the 3G plans as well; thank the gods there’s no contract madness. Oh, and unlocked, of course. In terms of commercial viability, I think this point alone makes up for all my complaints above, and this thing will sell.
2. No camera? That’s kinda crazy; I’m assuming that it’s going to get one very soon.
3. I wonder if this is something that’s supposed to replace laptops for the average non-technical user (like Mom). But, see point #4 above.
4. I really don’t care about the name; it sounds fine to me. I mean, c’mon, is “iPod” really that good of a name? One of my first impressions of the name was that it sounded like something out of a bad scifi movie: “The iPods are here… to eeeeeaaaattttt yyyooooouuuurrrrrrr BBBBRRRRAAAAAIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNSSSSSS!”
5. Arg, I really want to try out the iPad simulator, but then I need to finally clean my machine and get Snow Leopard. @apple Hurry up and refresh the Macbook Pros please!
6. That dock thing looks retarded. Also, who the hell is going to carry around a keyboard??? Wtf????? I really don’t understand this one.
7. 4:3 aspect ratio (1024 x 768)? Huh? I guess it’s easier for reading? That really sucks for watching movies though. By the way, the iPhone is 3:2 (480 x 320), so I’m wondering how auto-scaling for existing iPhone apps is going to work.

Now, the million dollar (well, $499 to $829 question): will I get one?

1. Yes, I probably will.
2. No, I will not get it right away; I just don’t trust Apple’s Rev A stuff (they don’t exactly have a great history), and I’m calling there’s going to be key feature upgrades (camera, please?) between the first and second gen, like there was with the iPhone.
3. Yes, the above might be a damned lie and I’ll just get it within a month or two of it coming out. Reason: point #7.
4. Yes, I can see how this will be the device I spend the most time with. Browsing and watching movies is by far my dominant task, so curling up in bed for hours with this thing seems pretty cool. BUT how do I put my own movies on it? Huh, need to think about this one. Mobile VLC???
5. No, there’s no way this will replace my laptop. But that’s because I need to write stuff and program. _Maybe_ it’s good enough for casual mail and spreadsheets.
6. No, there’s no way this will replace an iPhone. This one’s obvious, right?
7. No, I am not getting one because it’s awesome (thought it seems like if you use it, you fall in love with it pretty quickly), but because I want some of the App Store madness that will probably happen. The gold rush probably won’t be quite as crazy as the iPhone gold rush, but it’s still going to be a hell of a lot of fun (and profitable???) developing for it. The simulator is really no substitute. My experience with iPhone development is that UI and convenience issues that are obscure and abstract in the simulator just scream out at you when it’s actually on the device. And, think of the kinds of games you could make… <drool/>
8. Yes, I will probably get the 3G, even with the $129 increase in price. Seriously, no computer is worth anything if you can’t get online, and this thing is supposed to be mobile, right?

<sigh/> Time for me to get back to the real world and figure out real problems.

This entry was posted on Thursday, January 28th, 2010 at 15:31 and is filed under iphone/ipad, opinion. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.